Redefining SAHM

Photo credit : Vera Kratochvil

Since I’ve started this blog, I’ve considered a range of topics to write about.  Funny thing is, I’m not a writer.  I’ve never aspired to be a writer and got it in my head at a very young age that I was terrible at it.  That’s neither here nor there.  Point is, I feel like I have a lot to say.

Something that has been on my mind since I found out I was pregnant almost three years ago is: “What will I do for work?”  I’ve always known that I wanted to work.  It’s in my DNA and a big part of who I am. I love working and fell in love with digital advertising immediately.  I also knew that working in the online industry would one day allow me to work remotely because the internet is everywhere and these people are savvy.

Over the past few years, I’ve had various freelance jobs with all types of companies.  Once my daughter started crawling, I soon realized that working part-time from home with a baby who refuses to follow any type of nap schedule was near impossible.  I took a hiatus and focused on her for another year.  Now, she’s two and in school two times a week for half a day.  Amazing.  This means, mommy needs to get into gear.

Reflecting on the past two years and how things have transitioned to where they are now, I can’t help but think about my decision to stay at home with our daughter.  We specifically moved to Portland, OR from Los Angeles because we knew the cost of living would allow me to be home while my husband worked remotely for his company based out of LA.  We’ve both sacrificed a lot to provide our daughter with what we felt would be the best circumstances for her.  With no family or friends in Portland, we’ve literally built a home from scratch.  A challenging undertaking, but so worth it.

I think about my girlfriends who work full-time and those who stay home.  These women are extremely intelligent and great moms.  Each path has its own pros and cons, good days and bad days, but in the end, we all love our children so much.  No matter what, it’s tough to find balance.  Am I doing the right thing?  Am I a good mom?  The approach is so different — to stay at home or to work full-time.  It’s so black and white.  If you work full-time, you have mommy guilt to deal with.  If you stay home, you give up your career.  More times than not, I hear moms say, “The perfect situation would be to work part-time.”  Unfortunately, a part-time job isn’t going to pay as much as the full-time one, so it’s not much of an option is it?

So, here I am.  I’m attempting to create my own part-time work that will allow me to bring in full-time scrilla.  Funny, right?  You’d be surprised how possible it really is.  A mom with only three hours to work can get six hours of work done.  Actually, I think we all can.  Be honest, who really works for eight hours straight?  I’d contend that there are some serious lulls in a full work day.  Turns out, there are a lot of women doing this and reshaping the way we think about being a “SAHM”.

My husband forwarded me this over a week ago.  I’m embarrassed to admit that I’m only reading it now.  I encourage you to read it, too.  I’m inspired by what women are doing — being moms and also maintaining a sense of self.  We are multi-dimensional human beings.  In my humble opinion, we do our children a disservice by only being one thing to them.  I love being a mom, but I also love being me.  It’s easy to forget who that is sometimes.   I work hard at reminding myself.

Ps. Isn’t this song catchy?  The lyric video is creative, too.